The heart. It is what keeps us alive by pumping its life-giving blood through our bodies. But it is also a term we use to mean our souls, our minds, or anywhere we believe emotions and feelings flow from. This we try to guard every day from the threats of loneliness, rejection, abandonment, depression, anxiety, fear, manipulation, and simply being hurt. We try to protect ourselves from anything that might hurt us emotionally or psychologically, and this is good to do to a certain extent.
Naturally, then, there is a verse that many people use to support the idea that we must guard our hearts from emotional abuse or hurt. The verse is found in Proverbs 4:23, which says: "Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life." Some translations, like the NIV, say "guard your heart, " but the idea is the same. So, the question is: does this verse teach us that we are to guard our hearts from emotional hurt? We believe it is saying something quite different...
The Closed Heart
Before we delve into what the true meaning of this verse is, let us first give an example of how this verse is misapplied. Imagine a college-aged woman in a relationship. At first the relationship was great; the man wooed and courted her by often giving her flowers, taking her out to eat, telling her how beautiful she was...you know, the usual. As the relationship progressed, the woman's feelings for her boyfriend became stronger—as did his feelings for her. But there was a problem. You see, she had once given her heart to another man, who proceeded to destroy it, causing her to go into depression.
Now she had a choice: should she give this godly young man a chance, or should she not let herself fall deeper in love with him? Her mother, at the time of her previous relationship, had advised her to "guard her heart," and to not get too close so she wouldn't get burned, citing Proverbs 4:23. The woman ignored her mother's advice before, but now she could see that her mother was right, and she wouldn't be making that mistake again! She was going to close her heart up for good. She was convinced by God's Word...or at least her mother's interpretation of it.
Is this what God meant for us to do by including Proverbs 4:23 in the Bible? Does He want us to close our hearts up to people because we believe we might get emotionally hurt or end up with a heartbreak? Is that what this verse teaches? Let's see...
Context Is Everything
In order to find the true meaning of Proverbs 4:23, we must read the entire chapter to get some context; then, we must cross reference our understanding with the rest of Scripture to see if the principle or teaching is found and supported elsewhere in the Bible. This is how we discover what this verse TRULY means.
Proverbs 4 starts off with the tender instructions of a father to his son, just as he was himself taught by his father. He tells his son to hold his teachings close to his heart, and to follow his commandments so that he may live (Proverbs 4:4). Then he proceeds to personify wisdom, telling his son to love, prize, and guard "her," for she will guard him and will be his life (Proverbs 4:5-8). Again, in the next section (Proverbs 4:10-19), the father admonishes his son to accept his words. He also warns him not to associate himself with wicked and evil people, to not take their path, for it is dark.
Once again, the father instructs his son to be attentive to his wise words, to not let them out of his sight, and to keep them within his heart—for "they are life to those who find them, and healing to all flesh" (Proverbs 4:20-22). Then we get to our verse, which says: "Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life;" and continues with: "Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you. Let your eyes look directly forward, and your gaze be straight before you. Ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure. Do not swerve to the right or to the left; turn your foot away from evil."
The Wise Heart
With the above context in mind, it should be fairly easy to see that what this chapter is exhorting us to do is acquire wisdom (done so through God's Word), and to keep it in our hearts so that we may walk uprightly, without steering off the good path and into an evil one. This chapter is about guarding our hearts from the very real threat of sin in our lives, be it in the form of pride or evil doing. Proverbs 4 is a warning to us to ponder our ways wisely, always making sure we are doing what is right before the Lord.
So, what does our verse (Proverbs 4:23) mean? This famous verse is instructing us to guard our hearts at all times from the tempting path of sin and evil, not from a heartbreak. As James 1:14-16 says: "But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers"—that is, guard your hearts and minds. This notion is supported elsewhere in Scripture.
If you remember, Jesus once said: "The good person out of the good treasure of the heart produces good, and the evil person out of evil treasure [of the heart] produces evil; for it is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks." Our hearts are, indeed, either a wellspring of life or empty sepulchers (Matthew 23:27). This is why Jesus and the rest of Scripture puts an emphasis on guarding our hearts: we are all susceptible to sin and evil. But we do have our blessed hope...
Reflection
Jesus alone, through the power of the Holy Spirit and His Word, can truly guard our hearts until the day of redemption when He returns. He has the power to "keep us from stumbling and to present us blameless before the presence of His glory with great joy" (Jude 1:24). When we have the heart and mind of Christ, and are led by His Spirit, then we will strive to walk in a manner worthy of our calling as His children (Ephesians 4:1); we may get angry, but we will sin not (Ephesians 4:26).
Therefore, "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things" (Philippians 4:8). And remember, "the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." Guard your heart from sin and evil to please the Lord you love.
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